Valentine’s Day inspires love, closeness and even in cases the creation of the next generation. That said, this amazing holiday isn’t all grand romantic gestures and heart-shaped boxes of chocolate. While half the world is out there celebrating, the other half is alone and bitter. While you’re out having your romantic dinner some folks are tweeting about the holiday in the most hilarious way you can imagine. Today, we’re going to look at some of the most hilarious Valentine’s Day tweets. Prepare to burst into a fit of laughter.
While the idea of kids can sometimes be really cool and fun, there is a whole other side to it. You won’t believe what difference being around an actual family can do. Marl is probably doing some couples a gigantic favor by hitting those restaurants.
I bring my kids to a romantic restaurant on Valentine’s day as a birth control reminder to the other couples.
— Marl (@Marlebean) February 11, 2015
These young hotshot couples are going to get a load of the screaming baby, the fussy eater and the parents who can’t keep their kids in one space of a single second. Surely this will have to give couples something to think about whilst getting lost in the heat of the moment.
Two Sides To Every Coin
A “successful” Valentine’s dinner is all about setting the correct mood. While most couple would agree that dimming the lights is a great way to enhance the romance, this person clearly was still thinking practically. After all, the key to most people’s heart is their stomach.
*lights dim in restaurant*
DATE: did it just become sexier in here?
ME: I CAN’T SEE MY MENU
— batkaren (@batkaren) January 12, 2015
If you can’t see the menu you can’t be positive you’re ordering the right item. That’s a recipe for disaster (no pun intended). Apparently, this tweeter was still focusing on food and not how sexy the ambiance in the restaurant was.
When You’ve Spent Way Too Long In School
Dates are supposed to be laid back and chill and certainly one can’t be too polite or official when out on a date. You want to see a bit of the real person and not some cover-up. This date kept raising her hand every time she wanted to speak. That was uncalled for.
me: [raises hand]
my date: again, that’s not necessary
— chuuch (@ch000ch) November 10, 2014
While some might see it as charming and cute, others can be very put off by such behavior. That said, we think that this means for an amazingly funny tweet. I wonder what would happen if he ignored her raised hand. Would she just sit there with her hand up?
Funny Or Psychotic?
Depending on the woman he’s dating, this will either make her laugh or completely freak her out. We’re hoping for the first. If this was their first meeting, this would definitely be taken as a caution sign for the woman.
“I’m going to use the restroom *leans over table* and I counted my onion rings, there’s six.”
— Tommytoughstuff (@Tommytoughstuff) April 13, 2015
She would have two options at that point. She could either cower in fear or take an onion ring and see what happens when he returns and realizes that one is missing. Hopefully, he does lose his mind when recounts them.
Pressed For Time
Valentine’s day can be extremely romantic, but it can also be a complete drag for some. There is no end to the amount of pressure that comes with such a day. You want to make a grand romantic gesture or spend lots of money for flowers, chocolate and reservation at some fancy joint.
Let’s all take a moment of silence this Valentine’s Day to think about the couples who started dating end of January
— Mike Ginn (@shutupmikeginn) February 14, 2015
That said, what if you just started dating this person at the end of January. There are so many things you don’t even know about your date and now you have to put up the biggest effort in the world for them. Things could go completely wrong here.
Love Is For The Birds
One thing that really sucks is being alone of Valentine’s Day. You know that as you sit home and watch Terminator 2, some couples are out there having an absolutely smashing night. You, your alone, but you don’t need to be.
Nobody likes being alone on Valentine’s Day. This tweet gives some great advice and shows just how easy it is to find plenty of company. All you need is a loaf of bread and probably some old shoes.
You are never alone on Valentine’s Day if you’re near a lake and have bread.
— Mike Primavera (@primawesome) February 14, 2015
Just follow this amazing tweet and head to your local lake. You can feed the birds and they might make some eye contact and make a sound. Seeing those animals enjoying your bread will definitely give you a nice feeling inside.
That’s One Way To Look At It
Let’s face it, Valentine’s Day has been over-commercialized by this point and not everyone is happy about it. This guy is clearly one of those very unhappy people. We agree with him to some extent, but this guy is definitely on the extreme side.
HOW TO MAKE A VALENTINE:
1. Get paper
2. Color paper red
3. It looks like bleeding paper
4. This used to be a living tree
5. We are monsters
— Chris Worthington (@SomeChrisTweets) February 11, 2015
Gift cards are more popular than ever these days. It is an industry that is worth millions upon millions of dollars. Holidays like Valentine’s Day are when they are making the most. That thought alone can definitely make some people bitter.
Now That’s Love
One can totally get lost in the material and fancy dinners that Valentine’s Day is now being driven by these days. We should remind ourselves that such a day is about love. Love means have an understanding and acceptance of your partner.
Wife: I have to go to the store. Need anything?
Me: I need a Valentines Day card for you. Get something nice but not too pricey.
— Rodney Lacroix (@moooooog35) February 10, 2016
This tweet shows us a couple that truly understands one another. Some girlfriends and boyfriends would completely freak out over such lackluster behavior. Whilst we don’t highly recommend this behavior, it seems to work for them.
Speaking Of Understanding…
While some couples are more like the ones mentioned above, some are very tired of lazy behavior. They want a mate who makes an effort. Not only about Valentine’s Day, but about basic things in general. This guy is definitely in trouble.
Blow her mind this Valentine’s Day by PUTTING YOUR OWN DAMN DISHES IN THE DISHWASHER BRANDON THEY DON’T NEED TO “SOAK”
— Renowned Philanthropist (@SortaBad) February 13, 2015
Most of us know how this goes as this is the perfect representation of what it means to be in a relationship and live in the same home as your significant other. This woman doesn’t want a fancy dinner, she just wants her man to put the dishes away.
Sort Of True
— Josh (@iwearaonesie) February 11, 2017
Valentine’s Day definitely isn’t the most important holiday of the year. It certainly isn’t a Christmas, New Years, Easter or 4th of July. Give the guys a break.
Open For Interpretation
I told my wife her Valentine’s Day gift this year is the privilege of being married to me. She’s so happy she still hasn’t stopped crying.
— James Breakwell, Exploding Unicorn (@XplodingUnicorn) February 14, 2013
We hope that she is crying tears of joy. Chances are, she might just feel torn apart inside and doesn’t know what to do with her life.
It’s The Thought That Counts
The Valentine’s Day lingerie display in Walmart is like a buffet of sadness and bad decisions.
— Abby Heugel (@AbbyHasIssues) February 10, 2017
Walmart isn’t exactly selling the highest quality of clothing. We can’t even wrap our heads around the person who would buy lingerie there.
A Unique Date Night
For Valentine’s Day, let’s avoid people we know in Target together.
— Amy Dillon (@amydillon) February 12, 2017
While Walmart is harsh look into the tired eye of humanity, Target is often pleasant. The thing is, is that you often run into people you know there and often times try to avoid them.
I’m chaperoning a Valentine’s Day date for my 15yo and his girlfriend so I made her garlic pizza for dinner. Genius Level: 100
— JennyPentland (@JennyPentland) February 15, 2016
Certainly, Jenny has had better Valentine’s Days. One can’t deny your Valentine’s Day is a drag when you have to watch young love bloom over pizza whilst you wallow in loneliness.
Some Friendly Advice
Hi, welcome to dating. These are your two options:
1. Stay together forever
2. Break up
— Spanky McDutcherson 🔸 (@thatdutchperson) October 5, 2014
While we think that this person is stating the obvious, it appears they have been on bumpy dating road in terms of dating and are becoming let down by it.
Way To Stay Positive
Still plenty of time to disappoint your Valentine. And everyone else in your life for that matter.
— Jake Vig (@Jake_Vig) February 12, 2017
This is definitely a tweet that will resonate with the masses who have been let down.
Two types of people on Valentine’s Day pic.twitter.com/mZHjdLjTUZ
— T-Foots (@t_foots) February 1, 2016
While I suppose two is better than one. At least we have options.
A Solid Wish List
I’m not sure what my husband has planned for Valentine’s Day but I hope it involves him taking the kids & leaving me home alone.
— Sarcastic Mommy (@sarcasticmommy4) February 10, 2017
While most of us are planning fancy dinners, a spouse like this would not appreciate them. She just wants to be alone.
We Like That Math
If you’re single on Valentine’s Day you’re allowed to have two dinners right?
— Mitchell Davis (@mmitchelldaviss) February 6, 2016
Valentine’s Day is all about love and one of the most important kinds of love is self-love. That said, we fully support this man’s idea.
The Gift That Keeps On Giving
I wouldn’t say I’m unpleasant, but I would say my husband bought me a cactus for Valentine’s Day and I was not surprised.
— Northern Lights 🎄 (@PinkCamoTO) February 8, 2017
Plants coem in many types and if you’re thinking of buying someone a plant for Valentine’s Day don’t buy a cactus.
That’s One Way To Look At It
Sending flowers to your significant other at work is a great way to tell all their coworkers that you used to have $60.
— ratthew (@sucittaM) February 14, 2012
We totally get how it can be a little embarrassing to recieve flowers at your office, but we think that this woman should appreciate it.
What A Fun Game
Can’t wait for Valentines Day. I’m gonna run into as many restaurants as I can shouting “Knew I’d find you here! You bastard” then run out.
— 🌈🌈Ruthe Phoenix🌈🌈 (@RuthePhoenix) January 24, 2015
Valentine’s Day doesn’t have to be boring if you’re single, you can always do what this woman does and possibly start some arguments.